Protecting Me
by joeysgirl4eva
Summary: My first songfic and first fic posted ever. It's based on Sam and Dean's relationship. I would love feedback. Thanks!


Protecting Me

You-You're always there for me 

_When I need you most_

_Day and night you're by my side_

_Protecting me_

"Take your brother outside as fast as you can. Now, Dean! Go!" John demanded, thrusting the six-moth-old baby into the arms of his older brother. Dean nodded, making his way quickly down the stairs, holding tight to Sam as he felt the heat from the fire, which was warming his back, slowly dissipate, as he finally made it outside. The four-year-old turned toward his home, watching it become engulfed in flames.

"It's okay, Sammy," he said, feeling nothing but the cold grass on his bare feet and the familiarity of Sam's small body next to his own.

When I feel like crashing down 

_You seem to be around_

_There you are, you're not that far_

"This is about Jessica, isn't it? You think that's your dirty little secret. That you killed her somehow? Sam, this has got to stop, man. I mean, the nightmares and calling her name out in the middle of the night. It's gonna kill you. Now listen to me. It _wasn't_ your fault." Months later, Sam didn't remember the driving rain pounding against the Impala or other cars' headlights flashing eerily into the wet, dark night. What he did remember was Dean's apparent concern leaking into his voice, determination etched across his face. He wasn't about to let Sam blame himself for something he had no control over. At the time Sam heard Dean's words but was still too consumed with guilt over Jess's death to really understand the meaning behind the words. Now Sam realized that it was Dean's way of saying: "_I love you, Sammy, and I don't want to lose you."_

_When my life's tumbling around_

_You take me off the ground_

_You tell me everything's O.K._

Dean rushed into the living room of his familiar childhood home to see Sam struggling on the floor, a lamp cord wrapped around his neck, choking him. Dean got to his knees, pulling Sam toward him, loosening the lamp cord around his brother's neck, finally pulling it off completely. He held Sam close trying to prove to himself that his younger brother was in fact alive.

"It'll be okay, Sam. I promise," Dean whispered hoarsely. Sam's shallow breathing slowly returned to normal.

"Dean? Is it over?"

"Yeah. Yeah, Sammy, it's over."

_When it's my turn_

_To help you out_

_I'll gladly lift you up_

_Without a doubt_

Dean lay in a hospital bed, the color drained from his face as he struggled not to look into Sam's eyes as they welled with tears.

"Look, Sammy, what can I say, man? It's a dangerous gig. I drew the short straw. That's it, end of story."

"Don't talk like that, all right? We still have options."

"What options? You have burial or cremation. And I know it's not easy, but I'm gonna die. And you can't stop it," Dean insisted firmly.

"Watch me," Sam said just as firmly.

Dean stared at Sam in amazement, feeling a lump rise to his throat. His brother was really growing up. He wished briefly that he would be around long enough to see what Sam did with this newfound maturity.

_Whenever, wherever, baby_

_I'll protect you no matter what_

_Hold you tight with all my might_

_And I'll never let you go_

Their whole world order had shifted once again. Their father was dead and Dean insisted on piling the blame onto his shoulders. Whatever Sam said or did wasn't having any effect on the way Dean felt about the way things had transpired the day their dad died.

They were sitting on the side of the road, each of them leaning comfortably against the front bumper of the Impala. The sky was a vibrant blue and the sun beat down on them, but Sam wasn't any warmer. Something was horribly wrong. Dean hadn't pulled the car over to the side of the road since they'd been in Toledo that dark and rainy night to talk about Jess.

"Back at the hospital I made a full recovery. It was a miracle. Five minutes later Dad's dead and the Colt's gone. You can't tell me there's not a connection there. I don't know how the whole thing went down exactly, but Dad's dead because of me. And that much I do know," Dean said softly, struggling to hold back his tears.

"We _don't_ know that. Not for sure," Sam insisted.

"Sam, you and Dad are the most important people in my life. And now… I never should have come back, Sam. It wasn't natural and now look what's come with it. Now he's dead. And I should've stayed dead. You wanted to know how I was feeling, well, that's it. So, tell me, what could you possibly say to make that all right?" Dean asked in a broken voice, the tears finally making their way down his face. Sam stared at his older brother, his eyes welling with tears as well. _You're right, Dean. I don't know what to say to you to make this all right. But I'm not about to let you give up just because you're feeling guilty and you're in pain over Dad's death. Dammit, Dean, it wasn't your fault! _He thought.

"Dean, I'm not going to pretend to know what to say to make things okay for you. But could you at least hear me out for a second?" Dean nodded wordlessly; his eyes were red from crying and his throat felt raw as he swallowed. "It wasn't your fault. And I'll be damned if I'm just going to sit idly by watching you give up. I wasn't joking when I said you're scaring me, man. I don't want to lose you. I _won't_."

"Sam, we've already had this conversation. I heard you the first time, all right? Now let's go," Dean said, making his way toward the driver's side of the Impala. Sam grabbed onto his arm.

"No, dammit. This is one conversation you can't walk away from. We're finishing this. _Now_," Sam growled, glaring heatedly at him.

Dean angrily spun toward him. "What is this, Sam!? What the hell do you want from me!?"

"Dad is dead and it wasn't _your_ fault! Just like Jess's death and Mom's weren't mine. You know as well as I do that the demon's responsible for this. That's why we've got to find another way to kill it, all right? There has to be another way to kill this thing," Sam said determinedly.

"What if there isn't, Sammy?"

"Well, we can't think like that, Dean. We'll find the demon again and we'll waste it," Sam promised. Dean let out a heavy sigh; suddenly he didn't feel so alone.

_You-You're always there for me_

_When I need you most_

_Day and night, you're by my side_

_Protecting me_

_Protecting me_

** THE END **


End file.
